Fun Tweets / Tweets about 2012 London Olympics

@samalmightysam
After all the medals Jamaica won in the Olympics there are still stupid people out there who doubt the power of weed.

Aug 12 Reply Favorite Retweet

@sween
Wait- the Olympics are over? But what about the brands? WILL NO ONE THINK ABOUT THE BRANDS??

Aug 12 Reply Favorite Retweet

@aparnapkin
i hope the olympics gets renewed for another season

Aug 12 Reply Favorite Retweet

@DeathStarPR
Now that the #Olympics is finally over we can all get back to everyone’s favourite sport of hating and killing one another.

Aug 12 Reply Favorite Retweet

@smelbz
WAIT the Olympics get 3 weeks and the sharks get 1 week I'm sensing an imbalance in the universe

Aug 12 Reply Favorite Retweet

@sween
The bronze medal is the most Canadian medal. It’s really good without being uppity.

Aug 12 Reply Favorite Retweet

@robfee
Usain Bolt is pretty arrogant for a guy who’s in the spotlight fewer times a decade than Punxsutawney Phil.

Aug 11 Reply Favorite Retweet

@juliussharpe
Not sure women's BMX is what the Greeks had in mind when they started the Olympics.

Aug 9 Reply Favorite Retweet

@scullymike
The biggest challenge for any Olympic athlete is to avoid winding up like Bruce Jenner.

Aug 9 Reply Favorite Retweet

@DannyZuker
Watching the olympics I worry the world may be getting the wrong impression about the fitness of most of my countrymen.

Aug 9 Reply Favorite Retweet

@samalmightysam
Poor Jamaican women. They have the world's fastest men. How are they ever going to catch them?

Aug 9 Reply Favorite Retweet

@robfee
The Olympians stories are amazing! The Kenyan whose family was killed, the Korean who escaped slavery, the American who never had wifi.

Aug 7 Reply Favorite Retweet

@scullymike
Every four years, for two weeks, ping pong becomes "table tennis".

Aug 4 Reply Favorite Retweet

@hipstermermaid
Oh, I get it now; The Olympics are designed to destroy our self esteem and body image.

Aug 4 Reply Favorite Retweet

@rejectedjokes
Four years of training, all that hard work, just for the slight chance to be in a Subway sandwich commercial. #olympics

Aug 3 Reply Favorite Retweet

@scottsimpson
Every Olympic event should include one average person competing, for reference.

Aug 3 Reply Favorite Retweet

@imchriskelly
The adult version of learning theres no Santa Claus is being inspired by an Olympic athlete and then reading their twitter feed.

Aug 2 Reply Favorite Retweet

@ChaseMit
You never see Michael Phelps's father in the stands because he is a dolphin.

Aug 2 Reply Favorite Retweet

@Paxochka
I've watched so much Olympics I read my timeline with imaginary commentator voiceovers critiquing your performance.

Aug 2 Reply Favorite Retweet

@tedalexandro
I think Olympians should defect & form their own country; Olympia. That country would win every medal & Olympia Dukakis would be President.

Aug 1 Reply Favorite Retweet

@rationalists
Olympic Fun Fact 2: Equestrian is the sport favored by countries that don't know where glue comes from.

Aug 1 Reply Favorite Retweet

@michaelianblack
When a US athlete wins an Olympic medal, it's like I won too. So when I sit around doing nothing all day, it's like I'm resting for them.

Aug 1 Reply Favorite Retweet

@Charles_HRH
Somalia on the phone. Very apologetic. They've only just realised that shooting and sailing are two separate events.

Aug 1 Reply Favorite Retweet

@rationalists
Fourth place is the first to regret giving up booze and drugs for 4 years.

Jul 31 Reply Favorite Retweet

@ChaseMit
Three months from now, a bearded Michael Phelps uses his silver medal to prop up a wobbly table leg at Denny's.

Jul 31 Retweet

@the_moonface
Am I the only one who thinks it’s funny that the Chinese athletes are competing to win back the medals they probably made a month ago?

Jul 31 Reply Favorite Retweet

@WilliamAder
I just know those Canadian bronze medals are going to show up in my change some day.

Jul 31 Retweet

@GuyEndoreKaiser
America definitely gets the gold in playing the same Olympic commercials over and over.

Jul 31 Reply Favorite Retweet

@dril
glued a bunch of steaks to my body & did some poses & got the 2012 olympic muscle man medal & threw it in the trash cause its commercialized

Jul 30 Reply Favorite Retweet

@funnyordie
The amount of awesome butts in the Olympics should make everyone feel proud together on a global level. #worldpeace

Jul 30 Reply Favorite Retweet

@robdelaney
ME WATCHING OLYMPIC EVENT: “Holy shit that was amazing!” COMMENTATOR: “Ooh, that was not good at all. He must really be upset with himself.”

Jul 30 Reply Favorite Retweet

@gonnnzo
If they banned crying and hugging from The Olympics, the whole thing would take a day and a half tops.

Jul 30 Reply Favorite Retweet

@iShagSheep
China is only winning in the olympics because they made all the equipment.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@anjeanettec
I really don't need the Olympics reminding me of how lazy I am.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@remainchampagne
If I can't identify a nation's flag or abbreviation whilst watching the Olympics, I assume it's a corporation.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@robfee
McDonalds sponsoring the Olympics is like the Kardashians sponsoring a job fair.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@ConanOBrien
The Olympics are being streamed online, so last night at 3 a.m. I tried to convince my wife I was on the computer watching archery.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@levie
Instead of Archery and Judo, there should be an Olympics for modern survival skills, like typing really fast and SEO optimization.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@davepell
My tweet critiquing NBC's tape-delayed Olympic coverage will be available for reading in a few hours.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@Charles_HRH
Rain. Official Sponsor of the London 2012 Olympics.

Jul 29 Reply Favorite Retweet

@sucittaM
It's great when Olympic commentators say "She really wants to take home the gold today" because it really helps me understand the sport.

Jul 28 Reply Favorite Retweet

@hipstermermaid
Yay Olympics for making me feel irrationally competitive towards other countries.

Jul 28 Retweet

@BorowitzReport
BREAKING: Athlete Without Compelling Personal Drama Expelled from Olympics #2012LondonOlympics #Olympics

Jul 28 Reply Favorite Retweet

@DannyZuker
Tape delay events rest of the world watches live? Check! Website info? Limited! Hire Seacrest. Done! It's show time, boys!"- NBC

Jul 28 Reply Favorite Retweet

@michaelianblack
I know this probably goes against the spirit of the Olympics, but all events really should be to the death.

Jul 28 Reply Favorite Retweet

@GaryJanetti
"I sure do miss my girlfriend who couldn't make it to London but does definitely exist." - every male gymnast

Jul 28 Reply Favorite Retweet

@Nickadoo
I wonder how many people have said, "Wear your medal while we do it," to an Olympic athlete.

Jul 28 Reply Favorite Retweet

@sweet_toof
I don’t know what hurts my wrists more: playing volleyball, or watching women’s volleyball.

Jul 27 Reply Favorite Retweet

@Molly_Kats
My fat ass will be critiquing Olympic athletes, who have trained their whole lives, from my couch.

Jul 27 Reply Favorite Retweet

@Hadzilla
Hello is your refrigerator running hahaha what the fu..*glance at tv to see a Frigidaire win silver in the 200 meters* "Yep. That's my boy."

Jul 27 Reply Favorite Retweet

@GaryJanetti
The Olympics would be better if instead of athletes they were Housewives and instead of sports they went on a trip where they all fight.