Feb 6 2013 Reply Favorite Retweet @BeerFarts101 I'm following around cop cars all day to let them know how it feels.
Nov 30 Reply Favorite Retweet @BeerFarts101 Walked into the gym and did 1 push up in front of everyone, then ripped off my shirt and walked out grunting 'You did it. You did it.'
Nov 8 Reply Favorite Retweet @BeerFarts101 I'm so lazy, If autocorrect doesn't know the word after 3 letters I don't even bother sending the text.
Nov 1 Reply Favorite Retweet @BeerFarts101 I call my car 'The Forest Whitaker' because the left light barely works.
Oct 16 Reply Favorite Retweet @BeerFarts101 John Travolta looks like the type of guy that would leave his toupee in a truck stop urinal for hours and then wear it to a musical.