@TragicAllyHere
A neat thing about 2020 is that enough stuff happens every month to fill an entire verse of “we didn’t start the fire”

@TragicAllyHere
My eight year old has started talking back and then saying (outloud) “hashtag roasted” and dabbing. Not one of the parenting books prepared me for this.

@TragicAllyHere
A fun part of marriage is arguing over who deserves to use the charger in the car. PROVE IT, SHOW ME YOUR PERCENTAGE

@TragicAllyHere
People who use the popcorn setting on the microwave are SHEEP who are too trusting of authority and refuse to think for themselves

@TragicAllyHere
Warning: if you're in a longterm relationship with another human they will still want you to be nice even after 8 years and it's like, a lot

@TragicAllyHere
I really wanted my kid to be a kid so I gave birth directly into the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese's.