@jorshuwah
An only child invented the boomerang.

@jorshuwah
Moths must love dying because they get to go towards the light. Ughh I just anthropomorphised moths with unverified human ideas about death.

@jorshuwah
If my name was Rudolph Spermguzzler I would introduce myself like this: Hi, I'm Rudolph Spermguzzler, sorry if it's a bit of a mouthful.

@jorshuwah
"I'm running late" makes sense. "I'm running early" makes no sense. "I'm standing impatiently early" makes sense.

@jorshuwah
I lost my only son today. Ha! Talk about a bad heir day.

@jorshuwah
Call it a hunch, but I'm pretty sure I have an abnormal convex curvature of the upper spine.