Feb 10 2021 Retweet @MelissatheDuffy I hate that teeth require so much specific care, the rest of my bones are so low maintenance
Feb 10 2021 Retweet @ozzyunc I only keep Facebook to watch people who were mean to me in high school botch their third marriages.
Feb 10 2021 Retweet @capnwatsisname [being escorted out of art gallery] I didn't touch the painting, and anyway it was already dry
Feb 10 2021 Retweet @anna__online is it so funny to me that acting awards are separated by gender. yeah nice oscar.... for a GIRL
Feb 10 2021 Retweet @welcomewords If a monkey hoarded more bananas than it could eat, while most of the other monkeys starved, scientists would study that monkey to figure out what the heck was wrong with it. When humans do it, we put them on the cover of Forbes.