@DannyZuker
A video of my kids attempting to cut steak would make an excellent commercial for condoms.
A video of my kids attempting to cut steak would make an excellent commercial for condoms.
@MsCassieDaniels
Netflix just announced it's raising the price and changing it's slogan to "One movie you wanna see and a thousand others you never heard of"
Netflix just announced it's raising the price and changing it's slogan to "One movie you wanna see and a thousand others you never heard of"
@JennyJohnsonHi5
It'd be nice if the pre-requisite to being a politician in the United States of America didn't involve being a lying sack of shit.
It'd be nice if the pre-requisite to being a politician in the United States of America didn't involve being a lying sack of shit.
@Schmoodles
Brushed my teeth before my breakfast and now my vodka tastes funny. :(
Brushed my teeth before my breakfast and now my vodka tastes funny. :(
@jumpdashark
My neighbor asked me if he can borrow my electric shaver. I had many concerns about this but I lent it to him. He returned it 20 minutes later with his beard fully intact and said, "Thank you, I feel like a new man." His beard was fully intact.
My neighbor asked me if he can borrow my electric shaver. I had many concerns about this but I lent it to him. He returned it 20 minutes later with his beard fully intact and said, "Thank you, I feel like a new man." His beard was fully intact.
@GuyEndoreKaiser
Smoking causes a huge financial burden that's shared by all of us, so it only makes sense that they get a bunch of extra five minute breaks.
Smoking causes a huge financial burden that's shared by all of us, so it only makes sense that they get a bunch of extra five minute breaks.