@tehawesome
What if horses rode horses? And then THOSE horses rode MORE horses? Then it's like, whoa dude! Check out that big stack of horses!

@tehawesome
If Twitter icons have taught me anything it's that the male eye can spot cleavage at incredibly low resolutions.

@tehawesome
Timmy, you're a great son but the YouTube analytics data from our home movies show that people think you're boring so go live in the attic.

@tehawesome
"You're never alone.": A phrase that's maybe cute to find in a love note, but horrifying to find smeared on a fogged up bathroom mirror.